Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Cheap Joke



This is my grocery basket from a recent trip.  This is not the joke part.

Easy Mac happened to be on sale, so I bought all I could find.  All that I could fit into my basket, while still leaving room for a tiny (just a tiny) bit of self-respect. 

Looking at my purchase, I felt a twinge of guilt.  Should one really buy ten Easy Macs, peanut butt, and bread?  Yogurt was on sale.  I went and bought a few cartons of yogurt, to keep up the pretense of being an adult capable of feeding herself.

My Easy Mac binge looked even more incriminating splayed out over the checkout conveyor belt.

"Please don't judge me," I chuckled at the checkout clerk, fear and shame brimming over in my eyes.  "It's on sale."

The cashier returned my pleading gaze with mirthless, heavy lids.  "99 cents."

"Yes, yes they are.  I'm stocking up.  This isn't all I'm buying,"  I chortled, nervous and defensive.  "See, I bought yogurt..."

"On sale."



Some people just can't take a joke.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Surprise From Behind



Surprise!

For ten years, I dyed my hair nearly every imaginable colour.  Starting when I was thirteen and yearned to be a feisty redhead, to my high school graduation whereupon I sported streaks of pink and purple, to the post-college long, blonde years.

Then, when I was 23, I decided to stop.  Cold turkey.  Put down some roots, if you will.

During my trim last week, I felt an itch to do something new.  I told my hairdresser I trusted him and wanted something "bold, but not so bold as to get me fired."

He dyed the back of my head to a light blonde.
You can only see it from behind.

Hence,

Surprise from behind.

The classiest, trashiest dye job possible.



Monday, October 29, 2012

What A Difference Four Years Makes



It may have passed a bit unnoticed this year, but September 8th was the four-year anniversary of my move to New York City.
Or, as I call it, my New Yorkiversary.


I think New York and I deserve a formal anniversary.  I think my love affair with New York City is real, lasting, legitimate.  Relationships may come and go, friendships fade away, and loved ones die.
But you can trust in New York.  You can trust it to bring you new experiences you never dreamed of, to foil you when you're down, and to be running even more behind than you are.


New York City is the perfect relationship.  You will never get bored.  You may suffer heartbreak when it changes, and feel sad, but there's always something new to discover.  New York is bigger and deeper and more complicated than you or I.  And she never gets jealous, either.


In The Colossus of New York, Colson Whitehead writes:

"The city knows you better than any living person because it has seen you when you are alone.  It saw you steeling yourself for the job interview, slowly walking home after the late date, tripping over nonexistent impediments on the sidewalk...The city saw all that."

I don't believe in any deity.  I don't believe there's anything watching over us.  But if you think about it, it does make sense.  All the things the city has seen.  Seen me running late and being a jerk.  Seen me blow a perfectly good date and kick myself all the way home.  Seen me feeling good and checking my reflection in every window.  Seen me face tragedy.  Seen me be kind to strangers. 


Call me crazy, but I believe in the city.  It's taken pretty good care of me so far. 




And New York?  Thanks for four beautiful years.


Sunday, October 28, 2012

Texts From the Hurricane


Somehow, in the course of the five hours I spent at work, nearly everyone sent me a text to warn me about the impending hurricane.


Some people may have been overreacting:




Some people were definitely overreacting:


I'm looking at you, state of Connecticut.


Still others may be underreacting:



I'll let you know how the roof goes.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Fill-in-the-Blank Friday!



1.  My favorite feeling in all the world is   riding the bus back home to New York City after a visit somewhere.  Even after all this time, I get antsy and excited on the NJ Turnpike and start lifting off my seat to catch a glimpse of the skyline.  And emerging from the tunnel into my magical Manhattan is like slipping into a dream .


2.  My favorite smell is  puppy feet.  Need I say more?
.


3.  My favorite taste is   mozzarella cheese.



4. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen was   Paris - cliche much? - from the balcony of the Perfect Hotel.  That is actually the name of the hotel.  Google it.  Then go stay there.


5. The best sound ever is
  a deep, hearty laugh.  I don't trust people with weak laughs.  I find a rich, soulful laugh to be so attractive in another person.  To me, it means they are giving their whole being over to laughter.


6. A smell that reminds me of my childhood is  
pencil shavings.  And anytime there's school supplies in stores.  Looseleaf paper and plastic binders!  I love the smell.



7. 
 My favorite of all the senses is  hearing, I suppose.  I couldn't live without music!

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Halloween Seven Things Link-Up!




Boo! 
Gentri Lee is bringing back her Seven Questions Link Up party for Halloween!  Go join in and have some spooky  linky fun!


1. Do you believe in ghosts?

As a ghost tour guide, I don't think I should say.  My job is to remain impartial, and to encourage open-mindedness.  I change my mind all the time.  You should be free to do so at your leisure.


2. Do you prefer the cute or the scary Halloween?

The cute, oh please, the cute.  My life is scary enough.  I want funny, witty costumes.  Leave the scaring to me...as the ghost tour guide.  See above.


3. How old were you when you stopped trick or treating?

I trick-or-treated for charity in my freshman year of high school.  So, 14?  I think.


4. Do you have any fun Halloween traditions?

I really, REALLY love watching old black-and-white horror movies and eating candy at home on Halloween night.  Call me crazy, but to me it's sweet.  I started in high school, I can still remember sitting down in the basement with all the coconut candy bars my brothers had rejected from their stashes, doing music theory homework and watching the silent Phantom of the Opera.  In college, I watched the AMC Halloween marathon while studying for my history midterm, Ashton at my side, eating Halloween Oreos (far superior to their yearlong counterparts).  Later on, I was deathly ill on Halloween, wrapped in blankets on the couch, watching the same channel nonstop, barely able to rouse myself from illness to carve a pumpkin to cheer me up.  That's probably what I'll do this Halloween...unless you want to invite me to your party!


5. Share a scary local urban legend.

I don't tell my ghost stories for free!  But I can tell you about the ghost back at my college theatre:

Once, I was taking a nap backstage on a couch between class and rehearsal.  The door was locked behind me and I was alone in the theatre.  I fell asleep on my side with my hair over my face.  I woke up what felt like hours later when someone brushed my hair away from my eyes.  I thought the doors had been unlocked to let the next group in.  I had only been asleep for minutes, and was still alone - the door still locked.

A while later, during a show, I was sitting backstage silently waiting for a cue.  I felt someone put their hands on my shoulders.  Trying to turn the tables on them, I waited for a while than whipped around quickly - and found again, no one was there.

As far as ghosts go, this one seemed pretty benign, maybe even a little sweet.


6. Would you rather be haunted or haunting?

Haunting, definitely.  I would be so creative.  None of that slamming doors ho-hum.  I'd hide your cellphone in a block of ice.  Play with the heater.  All kinds of cool stuff.


7. What's your favorite Halloween character/ creature? (dracula, witch, ghost, etc)

I love me a good carved pumpkin.  I usually just do mine to look like Charlie Brown's in It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown!.  It's not Halloween unless I watch that short - another tradition! - and quote along with it, word for word.  "You didn't tell me you were gonna kill it!"  And cry when Snoopy cries at the music and gets lost.  That is so sad to me!



Sunday, October 21, 2012

Sunday Social Link-Up!


Sunday Social


1. What do you value most in life?


People.  People make all the difference.  We are the world's greatest natural resource.  We have the power to affect each others' lives for better or for worse.  Let's please use it for the better.
 
2. What do you think is the greatest invention in your lifetime and why?

The Internet!  Without it, I would have almost nothing.  I am not even kidding.
It's how I met one of my best friends, found a roommate, stay in touch...
The Internet is great!

3. What do you think is the secret to a good life?

"Do not take life too seriously -- you will never get out of it alive!"
- My dad (and his favourite coaster)

4. What would you most like to be remembered for when you're gone?

Making people happy.

5. What accomplishment in your life are you most proud of?

Moving to New York City.


6. If a movie was made about your life, who would you want to play you?

Y'all better get Meryl.  If I go out leaving a legacy of love, you owe it to me to get me Meryl Streep.

Friday, October 19, 2012

Fill-in-the-Blank Friday!


1.  One thing I plan on doing to relax this weekend is  clean my room.  Am I lame?  I just want to start the week with a clean room.  This is my first "three day weekend" (meaning I only work evenings Thursday, Friday, and Saturday) so I want to make the most of it!.

2.  A big pet peeve of mine is  people walking slowly.  Don't you realize you're inconveniencing everyone behind you?  Running to work last night, I felt like an action hero racing against the clock, dodging and weaving tourists in Times Square.  GROW SOME LEGS AND WALK!!!.

3.  I am really loving  Garth Marenghi's Darkplace.  I adore British comedies, and I can't believe I haven't seen this one yet!  Richard Ayoade and Matt Berry, two of my favourite actors, are in it!  The writing is incredible.  Check it out!.

4. The rain is  a good excuse to stay in...and clean my room...and watch Garth Marenghi's Darkplace.

5. My favorite girly indulgence is  makeup, I guess?  I'm trying not to buy any more (unless it's essential, and I've run out, or there's a coupon).  I'm also trying to use up what I have, and it's led to some pretty interesting, um, results, I should say....

6. A song I always get stuck in my head is  any song that plays at work.  Actually, I'll usually wake up thinking a song, and it will be stuck in my head all day.  Yesterday it was "Xanadu".  This morning, it's "Ziggy Stardust."  And I didn't even take ZzzQuil either night!.


7.  The best cure for stress is  taking a nap.  Would that I had more time for things like NAPS!  I might have a lie down before my tour tonight, though.  Knowing you have time to do something as wasteful as sleep is a huge load off one's shoulders.  And today, I just might have that luxury!.

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

ZzzQuil, A Review



Have you guys tried this ZzzQuil stuff yet?

I've been so excited ever since I've heard of its existence.  Why, just 15mL of this stuff will knock you out, and for six hours, you're Jessica Simpson, renting a bedroom with three walls and pink furniture that doesn't match in style, with an open wall facing the back of Lincoln Center, where a street gang of homeless led by characters from the Peanuts Gang have decided that they must drown you to death in a jet ski race to ensure a good corn harvest.

Then you wake up with your pajamas on backwards, the pillows on the floor, and all but one of your blankets twisted up next to you, six hours later, confused and somehow thinking, "This is a story, called "The Lottery".  I should look that up on Wikipedia."  And sure enough, your literary subconscious has categorized the dream.

ZzzQuil is available at finer drug stores everywhere.

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

The Dangers of Male Friends



The [terrible] movie When Harry Met Sally opines that men and women can't be friends, because "the sex thing" always gets in the way.  Or something.  I only watched it once, because I completely disagree.  I have many male friends with whom the "sex thing" is never an issue.  And only a couple of them were gay!  Take that, heteronormative Hollywood dreck!

On the other hand, maybe there is something to the issue.  Having male friends has definitely raised my standards unfairly.

Take my friend Hans.  He is too clever.  He raises the bar on witty banter to a level that frankly, many people just can't match.  Having a texting conversation with him is an epic battle of quips, and he frequently makes me laugh out loud, IRL LOL!

My friend Matt is openhearted and romantic.  Soulful and adventurous.  He is generous with his time and his affections.  Matt is the perfect catch.  He's also gay.  Sorry ladies.

And Aaron, my dear late friend, was the epitome of chivalry.  He had a way with kindness that was not cloying or patronizing, but sincere and supportive.  Aaron would always pick up the check and refuse assistance.  He would bring soup to your house when you were sick.  And I still listen to the mix CD he made me in high school.  Aaron raises the standards on being a perfect gentleman.

So it's possible that, having (had) these awesome dudes in my life, I may be a bit picky on the dating scene.  Having such amazing male friends may be a detriment, but I wouldn't have it any other way.

Saturday, October 13, 2012

...And All I Got Were These SICK Photos

So I went to Comic Con!  It was a total fluke - my roommate wasn't feeling well, my date cancelled on me, and she insisted I take her 3-day pass for the day until she felt better.  I don't know how I will ever repay her - it was a total blast!  I'm definitely going back next year.  And yes, definitely in costume!

I had such a fantastic time - can't you tell???






Friday, October 12, 2012

Fill-in-the-Blank Friday!


1.  My favorite flower is   roses.  Blue roses, red roses, it's a cliche, but as a former actress, I am accustomed to receiving roses .


2.  You should never talk about    people behind their backs.  I still feel guilty about joining in on some joking about a girl at work when she walked into the room.  I deeply regret it, and wish I could have the guts to apologize, even though she didn't seem to mind.  Moral of the story, never talk about people behind their back, because you never know when they're behind yours
.


3.  My favorite discovery as of late is   "Alice" by Mott the Hoople.  I am listening to this song on repeat!.







4. This fall you will probably find me wearing     bright pants (plaid anyone?), fringed boots, and my raspberry corduroy cross-body bag that is kinder on my shoulders!.


5. I wish I were    Olivia Newton-John.  You may know her as Sandy from Grease?  She has the cutest accent and is just so cool and pretty and nice!.


6. My favorite TV show currently is   
RuPaul's Drag Race All-Stars, which has yet to start but I have been waiting like 6 months for Pandora Boxx to return to the competition!.



7.  This weekend I want to  go on dates, see a play, give a tour, do my laundry, and maybe cook something?.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Little Letters

Dear Spanish Karaoke:


I appreciate what you're trying to do there.  But please, keep it between the hours of 10:00am and 11:00pm.  This 2:00am and 7:30am nonsense is really inconsiderate.

Sincerely,


Ay Dios Mio.






Dear Weather:

I was hoping for a little autumn before we jumped right to winter.

Coldly,

Layering Up






Dear Manhattan,

I love being in you every night.  Let's take this relationship to the next level.


Love,

Your Constant Admirer



Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Past Life Regression: Musical Theatre Edition



Okay, I have to come clean.  Yes, there is a new man in my life.  Well, not so new.  But he touches me like nobody else can, and has since I was 13 years old.


This guy:

Source: google.com via Rachael on Pinterest



It's Andrew Lloyd Webber, duh.

Nothing like a sparkling ALW ballad to make a girl feel like a diva to her fingertips.  It's as if we never said goodbye, and I'm wallowing in the - yes - MEMORY, of first discovering something so beautiful that made me feel anything is possible.


I've been thinking a lot about that little girl, fifteen years ago.  What would she think of me.  Would she be happy?

I like to think yes, she is very happy.
She looks around and is amazed.
So much of life she has experienced...


Yes, anything is possible.


And yes, she still curls up on her bed and stays up all night listening to that guy.



Wanna join me?
Just give it a chance. 

That's...ALL I ASK OF YOU!!!



 

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Always Do Your Own Laundry




Saturday morning laundry is a ritual:  roomie and I carry our own things around the block to the laundromat, hang out and talk and dish, and wash our clothes. It's very fun, very Manhattan, and it's nice to have clean clothes.

This week, however, she's out of town! Lonely laundry for little yours truly!
Or perhaps not?

Walking toward the laundromat I happened past a guy also carrying a laundry bag. He stopped me and, in an untraceable European accent, asked me where the laundromat was. We introduced ourselves and I told him to follow me to the laundromat. After a pleasant chat, he dropped off his laundry, while I stayed to do mine.

Thirty minutes later, the laundry owner approached me with the phone:
"The guy you come in with... He called. Wants to talk to you."  I took the phone, bemused and a touch embarassed.

"Hello?"

That great accent:  "Hi, Meghan, I'm actually playing [drums with a band] on Tuesday, near the school, would you like to come?"

"Oh, I'm actually going to a reading on Tuesday, but can I give you my number to let me know of any other gigs?"



And that's why you must always do your own laundry.

Friday, October 5, 2012

Fill-in-the-Blank Friday!



1.  The last thing I ate was   pickles and a spicy chik'n patty with buttermilk ranch dressing.  And I may go get some cheese as I am still hungry.


2.  The last time I went to the beach was   longer ago than I can remember, so possibly 2000 when I was in Monterey with my family?  I was sixteen.


3.  My last vacation was   up to Buffalo to see my family!  And I got a sunburn by a pool there, does that count as a beach?.


4. The last place I drove was   to the dentist!  In May!  I don't drive.  I borrowed my mom's car on a trip home.


5. The last song I listened to was   "Monster" by Lady Gaga.  We play it at work, but I found it particularly poignant and decided to download it for repeat listening.


6. The last thing I watched on TV was   Master Chef.  I don't watch TV anymore.


7.  The last time I said "I love you" was   Huh.  Don't remember.  Now you're depressing me.


Thursday, October 4, 2012

Take Back The Blog



A lot of people have observed that, in the blog world, when you talk candidly and frankly, it is a double-edged sword.  Some people (me!) love reading blogs where you get to know a person honestly, flaws and all, and share in their life for real.  Maybe other people just want to see reblogged Pinterest pins.  Neither one is better, and neither one is right.  But when you fall in the middle, it can be confusing.

Confusing...like this outfit?


The last time I wrote a post where I shared a story I felt was "risky," I lost a follower.  An actual follower!  Losing followers can feel like losing friends.  I wondered why I cared so much whether one follower out of 118 was angry at me for trying to pick up a cellist in the park with a weird and possibly rude maneuver

I felt like I had to watch what I said.  On my own blog.  Crazy!  This is MY blog, and I should be the one who gets to approve content.  Blogs can and do exist without readers.  And so, I shall go on not seeking approval, but using the blog to explore my love of writing and reflecting.

Cuz what's the fun of reflecting in your own head?  Not fun.

Y'know what I mean?

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Seven Things Link-Up #25

Seven Questions time again?  This week is flying by with no letup in sight.  Let this photo of me dressed for a tour suffice as my funny photo this week, because hey, it kind of is funny:



1. Who is your celebrity doppelganger?

I get Zooey Deschanel a lot, but also think I look like Alexis Bledel of Gilmore Girls.


2. What's the farthest you've ever been from home?

Geographically, that would probably be Italy, right?  Nine-hour flights are the worst.  Especially when you're afraid of flying!


3. Fill in the blank: Fall ______.

Clothes?  I don't know.  I'm not sure what you need from me.


4. Would you rather have arms so long they touched the ground or feet the same length as your legs?

The long arms, I guess.  I could reach ALL THE THINGS!


5. What is the first thing you do in the morning?

Check my cell phone to see who texted me - or didn't text me - overnight.  Ugh!  So lame!  I know!


6. Apple Cider or Hot Chocolate?

Apple Cider all the way!  It's so much more fall-y than hot chocolate.  Besides, Hot Chocolate is desperate.  Everybody has packets of it in the back of their cupboard.  Anytime you want hot chocolate, you can have her.  But Apple Cider only comes around once in a while!


7. Would you rather start your life over (baby) or jump to the end of it (old-->death)?

Start it over, baby!  It's been quite a ride, I'll hop right back in line again!


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