Living with Adult ADD

Okay, I've been a little pissed off about these ads:

Adam Levine has Adult ADHD

Aww, can't organize your thoughts? Wow, you've got ADHD. I mean, if you sometimes can't organize your thoughts, that must be really difficult. Have you tried...writing them down?

As an actual adult (note: I may not be an actual adult) living with actual ADHD/ADD/whatever they're calling it these days, the oversimplification and overdiagnosis of ADD and these other "behavioral disorders" makes me really angry because now, half the country is "living with ADD"!!! And almost every college student is taking Adderall.

But what this means, is that people take my ADD less seriously. Since being diagnosed at the age of 7, thanks to a very observant 2nd Grade teacher, I have been on and off medications for years, self-medicating with caffeine in the meantime. It's always a balancing act, between being focused but unable to sleep (insomnia is a bitch when you're 7) and being unfocused and lazy. I am opting for the latter, less expensive option these days, and this is just a sample of what a typical day at my house looks like:

What I Meant To Do:
Make myself lunch.
What I Did Instead:
Washed the dishes, opened the bedroom windows, folded and put away all the underwear from the laundry pile on the couch, opened the kitchen window, cleaned the bedroom windowsill with Greenworks (ahh, Greenworks!), scrubbed the dish strainer with white vinegar (to eradicate the pink mold!), washed the counter, and eventually, yes, made lunch.

What I Meant To Do:
Take my makeup off.
What I Did Instead:
Sent in a job application, added to the collage on my bedroom wall, made the bed, sprayed all the rooms in the house with room spray, opened the windows in the living room and washed the windowsills, washed the windowsill in the kitchen and put the cleaning supplies away, read an entire DIY blog all the way back to the first entry, watched half an episode of American Dad!, looked for my flashcards in the desk and on top of the bedroom dresser, texted Eli to bring home some paper towels, washed my face.

What I Meant To Do:
Study for my tour tomorrow.
What I Did Instead:
Made ice cubes, ate chicken nuggets, ate candy, ate a cheese stick (dinner?), watched another 2.5 episodes of American Dad!, read political blogs. The laundry is still sitting on the couch, BTW.

Oooh! And did I mention I can't organize my thoughts? Bah. I'm going to record my own Adult ADD commercial:

Hi, I'm living with Adult ADD. Sometimes I start boiling water, then I watch an episode of MTV's True Life, then I remember that I was hungry and I go into the kitchen to find all my water has boiled away. Then I add more water, wash some dishes, make some coffee, add the noodles, then I troll facebook for half an hour, until the hunger pangs remind me again to feed myself. I come into the kitchen to find soggy, overcooked noodles, press "brew" on the coffee pot, and throw out the noodles. I make myself a sandwich, take it in the other room, watch Teeth on Instant Netflix, then go into the kitchen to put my plate away and find cold coffee there waiting for me. I have Adult ADD.